Think Before You Speak

For the past couple years I've been used to people asking if Jeremy & I have any kids yet. And I always give the simple answer of "Not yet". Sometimes it bothers me a little because of losing our first baby, even if it was very early on. But today someone really got to me.

I was finishing up an auto policy for a new customer. I already didn't like him because I couldn't tell if he was joking about me not going fast enough. He had an old DUI still on his record causing him to have a very expensive rate. Oh, and was insuring a $100k Mercedes! As I was printing the forms he was looking at my pictures & saw one of me & Jeremy from my birthday a couple years ago & asked if that was my husband & then asked if we had any kids. And I, as usual, said "Not yet". He immediately came back with this shock of "Why not?!" that sounded like nails on a chalk board. I wanted to yell back "BECAUSE I LOST MY BABY, JERK!!! WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD YOU ASK WHY!!!". But I didn't. I was calm & before I could come up with an answer he kinda interrupted with a comment about having trouble & I finally said that we lost our first one. And then he tried to make me feel better by telling me the story of a couple he knows who lost 8 & eventually had twins.

Well, that doesn't take away the pain of losing one! Most days I'm pretty good. It's only by the grace of God I have recovered like I have. But I do still get "those moments" & this was definitely one of them.

I make this request as a woman who was secretly trying to get pregnant & one who has gone through a lose but isn't wearing a sign on her back announcing it: When you're wondering why a couple hasn't had a baby yet, maybe it's not just because they're not ready. Maybe they are trying & God hasn't blessed them in that yet. Or maybe they have gone through a lose & are still dealing with that grief & don't want to be made to feel bad for not having children yet. I'm just sayin' folks, THINK!