The Best Post Ever!

Ok, so that might sound a little boastful just because this is my 100th post but it really is the best post ever!

Since starting my blog I've seen it as a sort of modern diary, a very public diary. And with it I have talked about my fertility pretty open here, here, here, here, here, & here. We have been trying to start a family since December 2006. During that time God said "No, not yet" with 2 losses. The past 15 months have been the hardest ever for us but God has been good to us & it has brought us closer together.

I'll admit I was starting to get to that point of wondering if it would ever happen. Seeing a negative test month after month is so discouraging. So when I decided that I would test on March 23 (Easter Sunday) I had very little hope. I just didn't think it would happen.

I sat on the bathroom floor I stared at the stick. And then I saw a plus sign start to form. At first it was faint but definitely there. I started shaking & crying. It wasn't out of excitement but out of fear. The last pregnancy started with a very faint line & then 5 days later we lost the baby. I immediately prayed that we not go through that again. But probably within another minute it was noticeably darker, much darker than the last time. I got up, woke up Jeremy & told him the news, crying still. He was confused why I was crying & my answer was that I was scared.

But then something came over me & since then I have not had that overwhelming fear & have had a peace that I cannot explain. We can definitely say that we can feel the prayers of our family & friends.

So far this pregnancy has definitely been different. For one thing, I continued taking pregnancy tests through the week & each morning the line was darker & darker. Here are the 6 (yes, 6!) tests that I took. The writing on there represents how many days past ovulation (dpo) each one was taken.

I have also not had the severe cramping that I had with the first pregnancy. Looking back I am fairly certain that that was my body trying to miscarry a baby that we had lost as soon as we found out about the pregnancy. There has been something that I can only describe as "stretching", almost like a pulled muscle. It doesn't hurt but noticeable. But it's been a week now since feeling that & I believe that is just my body stretching & getting ready for a growing baby.

My primary symptom has been fatigue. That hit me the day prior to testing so I should have seen that as a sign. Most mornings I feel pretty normal but come noon I just crash. Some days it's very difficult to drive! I've also had gas & heartburn, which is a new one for me. Lots of burping, even when I haven't eaten a big meal. I've been on starvation mode on some days. Nausea seems to be starting to settle in this week, mostly when I'm hungry. Eating makes it go away, but, let me tell you, eating is the last thing you want to do when you feel like that!

Yesterday was by far the most exciting day so far in this pregnancy! We had our first doctor appointment. I was under the assumption that it would simply be an exam & taking bloodwork. After my blood was taken (which consisted of 2 large & 3 small vials!) the doctor wanted to do a sonogram just to be sure all was going ok in there. I was immediately nervous. The last time we had a sonogram done all we saw was an empty sac.

The screen was facing the nurse & Jeremy at first. My heart was racing & I was trying so hard to not tense up. And then she turned the screen to me. And I saw our baby's heartbeat! I always knew that that moment would be emotional for me but after never getting to see that before it was even more emotional for me. I just cried & cried, this time for overwhelming joy. The baby doesn't even look like a baby yet. Looks like a little blob. But it's our little blob & we're in love already.

The doctor said that everything looks good & healthy, which is another sigh of relief. I am to continue taking prometrium twice a day through the remainder of the first trimester. He was also fine with me taking baby aspirin everyday through the rest of the pregnancy. I began that a couple months ago after my own research & seeing there is a possibility of a blood clotting issue.

I'll admit that I'm still a little apprehensive writing this blog. Even though seeing a heartbeat is a very good sign that everything is going as it should, I will probably remain a little fearful of losing another one. And now that I have seen my baby I am even more attached.

So my blog will be fairly focused on my pregnancy now so get used to lots of rambling & belly pictures (when I start getting that belly, that is). I'll post updates on how the baby is developing & how I'm feeling.

And as I have requested many times before please keep us in your prayers.